Many years ago I held a wedding for a business colleague of mine, and it was a very strange affair. Firstly, most of the guests, including the bride was barefoot. It was a classy place, and I felt like an outsider wearing shoes. The toasts on the bride and groom was done by their exes, and most of the guests came without a plus one. One of the things that I observed was that the set of friends all said that they were part of "Looserville".
When we look at life, some people are shot down so many times, that they truly feel at some stage that they live in Looserville. They start to believe that they are loosers, and loosing becomes a habit to them. They get so used to it, that they never try to get out of it.
I sometimes find myself in a similar position, especially when you try and try and work your backside off to get somewhere with success. These people at the wedding were all people who gave up on romance, and on love. I don't know what happened to them all, but the idea of Looserville stuck with me. They probably have been burnt so many times and cried so many tears that they actually gave in to the idea of being loosers, and embracing that.
I tend to find myself wanting to give up many times, I am not talking about Suicide, but rather to embrace the loosing and stop fighting it and trying to be successful. Sometimes you get tired of shooting for the stars of for success, as the disappointment is the thing that drags us down. The word "dis-appoint" actually is a verb, and I always see it is a missed shot at a target. But I always see it as an action from my side, I appoint the bad feeling in my life. I make it such that it feels so bad, that you actually do not want to get up and try again. And don't come with all of that sayings like: "it is not how many times you fall, but how many times you get up". We all know that, but we are people, and we have real feelings and don't live in a quotation book.
The problem that I always have with Looserville, is that it sometimes make you give up, even before you start. Even before you try something new, your muscle memory of loosing keeps you from actually enjoying the exhiliration of the deal or the hunt. Deep inside you you know that you need to be positive, you need to be in winning mode and on success vibration. But it is not always that easy, and I am more often in a space where I give up, although trying something, even before it is a negative or it doesn't work.
One of the other things that is done quite often in Looserville, is nothing. The disappointment, for some, is so big, that they don't even want to start. They would rather not try, because of the fear of being a failure. So giving up is part of their lives, giving in to the fear of making a mistake or not being successful. And we also get drawn into these feelings by others who live around us. People tend to tell us a lot of things that we are buying into, because it is important to us what other people think.
I try many things in life when it comes to business. One of my friends told me that another friend said a while ago that "Deon will be in the Old Age home and still waiting for that great bid deal". Well, that had a big influence on the way that I view myself and the things that I try, and it could make me give up, or keep me going. I can either become a citizen of Looserville, or I can decide to keep on going. As I am writing this, I am busy with a huge transaction, and yes, I will keep on going. Every time that I think that it is not going to work, I keep myself positive, and then something positive happens. Whatever I do in life, I have always known that on a level that I do not entirely understand, actions and thoughts attract. When I look at things that did not go my way in life, the moment I see them as an opportunity to grow and a stepping block to another success, things change. I do not give up, as I have seen in many stories in my life, that to keep on going is the answer. Just do it, without emotions, and if you put emotions into it, put positives one's in.
I have also been criticezed, bacause I love spreadsheets, and everytime a deal presents itself, I go plan how I am going to spend the money. I go online and I buy the things I want online, but stop just before the check-out station. I try to enjoy the success before it is even here. Naturally I do the work, naturally I look at the things that go wrong, but I can only control what I can, and my emotions and positive attitude helps me in overcoming the feelings of things that may go wrong.
The Philosophy in Looserville is that nothing ever works, so you must understand that when you visit people from there, they will keep on telling you the same thing. So you have to shrug it off and see it as something that you can expect. I taught myself that I should not divulge all my plans and what is going on with people living in Looserville, not because I think that they will jinx my plans, but because they take my focus away from what I want to accomplish. Remember, they don't think that things can be done and they do not believe in success. When success comes, they make it off as "luck". That is the only time when somebody in Looserville gets something done, when it is a miracle. This is logical, if they don't attempt anything, nothing will get done and it would take a miracle for them to accomplish something.
I personally think that Looserville is overcrowded, and you should try to visit, if you must, but not for long. Looserville has big gates and unscalable walls, so escaping from there is almost as impossible as from Alcatraz, so be warned. And the problem is that if you get stuck there, it is like a life sentence, without the possibility of Parole.
The enhabitants of Looserville, bacause of what they prescribe to, will always give excuses and usually puts the blame on somebody else. Although they do this often, they also live in self-pity, feeling very sorry for themselves. There is a constant murmour in the air of people that complain all the time. They are not happy in Looserville, but they do not look over the walls and they do not think that there is any life outside of the walls. They warn you all the time, and at some stage you realize that they are scared of the big bad wolf, which none of them has ever seen or encountered. They tell these amazing fables about all the bad things over the wall, so none of them will ever see how beautiful Hope-beach is or Success-mountain.
So, us that want to see Hope-beach or scale Success-mountain, we need to stand together, because we are sometimes lured into the town of Looserville. Even if you can't scale Success-mountain all the way, look at the vistas and understand that it is still much better than sitting in Looserville and staring at the inside of a wall and listen to the constant complaint.
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